Cooking for Bachelors: Bananas and Eggs (Bananeggs?)
I’m a single, straight dude (and that’s the story I’m sticking to). As such, I have certain stereotypes I have to uphold. My apartment has to be messy, my outfits need to be uncoordinated, and my cooking needs to be simplistic.
But simple doesn’t need to mean “out of a box”.
Most of my cooking these days sticks to a very, very simple pattern: cut fresh stuff up, mix it up, and optionally cook it. It’s a simple process which lends itself to experimentation. You’re hungry, you raid the icebox to see what’s in there, you pick a combination of elements and roll the dice. If you win, it’s delicious.
And sometimes you hit the jackpot.
This one I wouldn’t’ve thought of normally, but I was all out of omlette fixins’ (bell peppers, red onions, jalapeños, etc.), and I hate plain eggs. So I grabbed a banana off of my banana rack (because they were starting to go bad and their ranks needed much thinning) and mixed it into the eggs.
It was delicious.
It was fucking delicious.
And it’s so goddamned simple.
I hadn’t ever heard of anyone doing this and I’ve had a few breakfasts in my day, yessiree. It’s so simple that it hardly needs instruction, and it’s certainly been done before, but whenever I look at recipes I generally find them lacking, so here’s the illustrated guide to the breakfastgasm:
Bananas and Eggs
3 Large eggs.
1 Medium Banana, slightly overripe.
1. First, make sure you have bananas! I’ve found that older bananas which are going a bit soft work best here. If you use fresher bananas, consider mashing them less finely for a chunky-style variant!
2. I just bought an ikea Mortar and Pestle for mashing up things consistently. I was using forks and/or the bottoms of pilsner glasses before getting this, which worked well and gave the bananas a nice chunky consistency.
However, I really wanted an excuse to buy a mortar and pestle…
3. Right about now you should be turning on your stovetop and putting your skillet on it.
Oh, and you need a skillet and a stove for this whole operation…
You may also want to butter the skillet at this time. I generally turn the heating element to high and give it 4-5 minutes to heat up the pan before cooking.
4. Whisk (or in my case, fork) the eggs together in a bowl, and once the eggs have an even consistency, dump the bananas in.
5. And then mix the fuck out of them.
6. Pour the mixture onto the skillet, and use a spatula to keep the mixture moving. At first the mixture will be very liquid, but be sure to move the spatula against the pan all the way around within the first 5-10 seconds. The bottom layer will already start to be browned, and the only way to prevent this from all going downhill quickly is to keep the eggs moving.
You will shortly be rewarded with the light scent of bananas as the moisture from them escapes while they cook.
This really isn’t the hardest of foods to make.
7. In about 2-3 minutes, depending on how well cooked you like them, your eggs will be ready! Move the skillet from the heating element, and scrape the eggs onto a plate! Stick a fork into them, for they are done.
8.Om nom nom.
The results are a moist (but not soggy), lightly sweetened pile of scrambled eggs. I’ve tried this simple dish with and without butter, and as an omlette. I prefer the scrambled, butterless preparation, myself.
As an aside, I’m beginning to think that Bananas might be my favorite fruit. They’re versitile and have a subtle flavor that seems to be applicable to many culinareas. The awesomeness of the bananas I know make me mourn the fact that they are a strictly inferior breed to the bananas that used to be.