Futility (Duck you, iPhone)

Tim has the wireless card in his room, I assume.

Dare I blog upon my iPhone?

When I got my treo 700 a few years ago, I was pleased. A phone I could write programs for and connect to the Internet with! But soon I would find that coding for the treo was a chore, and while there were some good apps, it’s overall crashiness turned me sour.

I was sad that the irc app was modal (if a call or sms came in, there goes my conversation), but the AIM was kindly persistent. I was annoyed by the lack of options with the camera, at how obfuscated the process to install java was, and how often the phone just hung seemingly frozen for half a minute.

Now I have an iphone. Programming for it turns out to be a pain (Xcode is pretty but inconvenient, obj-c is weird…), the irc apps are still modal, as is the AIM. The camera is slow as dirt whereas the treo was responsive and could take video! There’s no option to run java apps at all on the iPhone, and the device often likes to freeze up for upwards of half a minute.

The treo also could be used as a USB modem, providing evdo to my laptop avoiding situations where one might have to tap repeatedly on a glass screen to make good on blogligations.

It also had buttons to actually press which I could type incrediballt fast upon and would not try to correct me if I ever wanted to say duck.

..Duck you, iPhone.

It also had an sd card slot, just like everything else I pwn.

And it could motherfickinf copy and paste! Can you believe it?

And it wasn’t madeof glass! By the end of my two year contract it was dinged all to shut from uncountable drunken fumbling, but the screen was perfect and it was in solid working order.

…and yet somehow, I wouldn’t go back.

I don’t want the iPhone either, mindyou. I doubt I want the g-1, either.

I just want a smartphone that doesn’t fucking suck.

WHAT? Fucking?!?! You’ll let that through? Duck you, iphone.

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Comments

  1. Duck/fuck/fucking is Apple’s idea of the presumption of innocence. You see, when you write fuck, Apple assumes that you didn’t actually mean such a heinous assault on the inbox of your friends, and that you were talking about some cute waterbirds. When you write “fucking” though, use of “ducking” is so rare that Apple considers this to be adequate probable cause and proceeds to hang you with your own words, you foul mouthed ass.

    What Steve hath made crooked let no man lay straight.

  2. We made an app for dealing with the auto-correct silent censor when typing emails: Duck You Undo! When an auto-correction occurs a big toolbar pops up just above the keyboard, you can’t miss it, and you can undo/redo the correction. You can also step through all the auto-corrections 1 by 1 before emailing. See demo vid atwww.markj.net/duckyou

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